


I love the way, I love the way, I love the way you hurt me, baby

by Miyukitty



Series: Yowamushi Ghoul [3]
Category: Tokyo Ghoul, 弱虫ペダル | Yowamushi Pedal
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Tokyo Ghoul, Asexual Relationship, Blood and Gore, Cannibalism, Canon-Typical Violence, Crossover, Developing Relationship, First Crush, Fluffy Ending, Getting Together, Hand Feeding, Homoromantic, Light Masochism, M/M, Murder, Mutual Pining, Obsession, Possessive Behavior, Scent Marking, Sorry Not Sorry, What Have I Done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-06
Updated: 2015-03-06
Packaged: 2018-03-16 13:01:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3489212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miyukitty/pseuds/Miyukitty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aoyagi might get caught stealing from a stronger ghoul again, when Teshima wasn't there to help. He might get tracked by the one with the Rabbit mask, and snatched while he slept under an overpass. He might make an impulsive mistake and get on a Dove's radar and end up in a briefcase.</p><p>Teshima was perfectly aware he thought too much, but he couldn't stop his fingers from pulling out the phone and crafting a carefully-worded-to-sound-casual-and-not-lonely-or-creepy text every now and then.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I love the way, I love the way, I love the way you hurt me, baby

**Author's Note:**

> Sequel to this: http://archiveofourown.org/works/3465224  
> (Although you probably don't need to read both stories to understand what's going on. Teshima is easily flustered and Aoyagi is shameless and also they eat people!) 
> 
> **EDIT:** NOW WITH [FANART?? ASDSDSDASDJFFASDS](http://kiriska.tumblr.com/post/112860316507/uhhhhhhhhhhhh-so-theres-a-yowapeda-x-tokyo-ghoul)
> 
> T2/TG crossover, where Sohoku are ghouls in Tokyo, the titles are trashy pop music lyrics, and I bring shame upon my ancestors by continuing to write! :,) This fic doesn't have any connection to canon events but it does assume reader has basic knowledge of ghoul anatomy.

 

The key turned in the lock, and the door to the tiny studio swung open with a creak. Teshima smiled apologetically at the superintendent. The man grumbled sourly and trudged back down the stairs.

 

"Sorry I forgot my key again," he lied pleasantly to the super's receding back.

 

He palmed the key stowed in his pocket, and exhaled slowly once he was inside.

 

Teshima was meticulous about keeping up appearances. He subscribed to magazines about varied hobbies such as cycling and cooking. He purchased groceries other than coffee grounds every once in a while. And just in case, every month or two he would pretend to be locked out or feign a maintenance emergency—just so that the super had _seen_ the magazines and groceries and would therefore have no reasonable doubt as to whether or not this tenant was human.

 

Teshima even left a few dishes in the sink at all times, and a note on the fridge that said "buy food tomorrow", because it was the little details that could make or break an alibi and he didn't want to be caught off-guard in a surprise inspection. He borrowed library books and studied people in the streets and was always adapting.

 

He tried to be prepared for anything. He really tried.

 

* * *

 

 

The morning after the scuffle they won, Teshima brought Aoyagi to his apartment. They had to hurry since their clothes were torn and bloody, and the morning commuters could stumble out of their apartments at any second. But they made it inside without further incident, and Aoyagi used the shower while Teshima laid out a shirt and jacket he didn't mind lending.

 

He had never had an actual guest over before. At least that someone was a ghoul like him so acting wasn't required. He didn't have to try so hard to be liked, and he didn't have to steel himself against the unexpected – like casual contact, sharing a meal, or anything that might trigger his kakugan. He could let down his guard here.

 

He wasn't accustomed to feeling so vulnerable in his own apartment. Teshima shrugged out of his torn shirt and hoodie, and removed the makeshift tourniquet. He probed the knitting scar tissue on his sore shoulder thoughtfully, knowing it would smooth out and vanish over the next several hours. He frowned, and tugged on a clean turtleneck to hide it from view. He bundled up the dirty clothes and stuffed them into the hamper.

 

Wearing a mask at all times meant Teshima lost track of his genuine feelings. Control was necessary to his way of life. He was still racking his brain to figure out why he had defended the ghoul last night, or for that matter, why he had trusted a stranger to _bite_ him. It was a stupid risk and he was not an impulsive person. He was meticulous and over-prepared for every possibility, or so he thought.

 

From what he'd seen so far, Aoyagi by contrast was refreshingly candid. The shorter ghoul might not speak much, but he did not hold back his reactions, and was the sort of person who ran on instinct and gut feelings. Perhaps that made him a typical ukaku user, prone to letting their heart rule their head. That sort of person was often hardest for Teshima to understand or predict.

 

This point was driven home when Aoyagi meandered out of the shower without a towel on.

 

Teshima was not particularly conservative, per se, and it wasn't like he had any issues with male nudity, there was nothing he hadn't seen before, but – _well_ – he hadn't expected a houseguest to be so comfortable as to walk around without clothes on within the first ten minutes of stepping in the apartment. Aoyagi glanced at him, and Teshima suddenly became very interested in the decoy pots and pans he left in the sink. He set about furiously scrubbing them with a sponge that had never been used prior until the tips of his ears stopped blushing pink.

 

When he risked a cursory glance over his shoulder, Aoyagi was dressed and seated quietly on the corner of his mattress, watching the sunrise through the window. His shaggy hair was still dripping wet, and the shirt Teshima was lending him was noticeably large on his small frame.

 

Teshima turned his attention back on the dishes he was polishing for the umpteenth time and lamented that he had not been mentally prepared for _this_ , but at least he had already asked the ghoul out to coffee.

 

* * *

 

 

The first time Teshima took him to the café on the corner he liked, they walked through the park afterward just to spend a little more time in each other's company, even though it was cold out. He was exhausted when he finally crashed in bed, and horrified when he woke up in the early evening and realized he forgot to get Aoyagi's phone number. He didn't know how long it would be before they saw each other again.

 

Aoyagi showed up on his doorstep a day later. He didn't own a cell phone but he felt like dropping by, he explained as he watched Teshima's coffeemaker percolate.

 

Teshima learned that Aoyagi did not have a place of residence, either.

 

He was not entirely surprised by this fact; more and more ghouls were out on the streets or squatting in abandoned buildings these days. Not everyone was as careful as him, or as good at playing a role.

 

As Tokyo citizens became increasingly paranoid, the Ghoul Countermeasures Law gained momentum. Landlords required blood test results with every rental application, because they feared they would be charged with harboring a ghoul even if they claimed ignorance. Teshima got his current apartment through a loophole – he opted for a home testing kit, "scared of needles unless I do it myself," he had laughed with just the right edge of embarrassment to be believable. His results came back with a normal RC cell count, but they didn't need to know where that blood came from.

 

He figured he could pull that trick at other low income areas when he inevitably relocated, but the nicer city apartments had built-in security such as RC scanners, and there was no way a ghoul could fool those. It was also hard to pay for things with suspicious employers not wanting to hire an unknown. A spotty history of moving from neighborhood to neighborhood raised red flags no matter how many magazines he subscribed to.

 

While he wasn't surprised Aoyagi was homeless, it did make him worry. Not for the first time, he wished Tadokoro was still around. Tadokoro's safe house had been well-defended. Teshima wished he could send Aoyagi there so he didn't have to worry every time they parted ways.

 

The third time they met up, Teshima brought Aoyagi to the mall and spent the last of his cash on a prepaid phone to stay in contact with.

 

* * *

 

 

He found himself worrying more than usual. Teshima was always stressed about paying rent, eating, and balancing one foot in the world of humans. He worried about Tadokoro, wherever he was. He got nervous sometimes when he didn't have a solid reason why – just an unsettled feeling of vague paranoia. But now he thought about Aoyagi as well, and sometimes those worries eclipsed everything else.

 

It was especially bad when the lights were out and he was supposed to sleep, and he'd put off hunting again so the hunger gnawed in his belly, and there was nothing better to distract him from being isolated.

 

Aoyagi might get caught stealing from a stronger ghoul again, when Teshima wasn't there to help. He might get tracked by the one with the Rabbit mask, and snatched while he slept under an overpass. He might make an impulsive mistake and get on a Dove's radar and end up in a briefcase.

 

Teshima was perfectly aware he thought too much, but he couldn't stop his fingers from pulling out the phone and crafting a carefully-worded-to-sound-casual-and-not-lonely-or-creepy text every now and then.

 

_[Hey!]_

 

_[…!]_

 

He always did get a quick reply, even if it was just punctuation marks. Teshima smiled as he tucked his phone away.

 

"See, everything is fine," he whispered to the dark room.

 

Then his smile turned guilty, and slowly faded. He fidgeted for a moment, unable to clear his mind once the thought popped into his head.

 

"He's been fine on his own all this time. Think about something else."

 

He twirled a strand of hair, and fidgeted some more. Then he sighed, rolled over, and let himself indulge in a bad habit that had started last week.

 

The shirt Aoyagi left at his apartment had never been disposed of. There was a large hole torn through the front and the back, and the black fabric was crusty from being saturated with ghoul's blood. Teshima shouldn't have kept it.

 

He knew that better than anyone. His apartment was carefully decorated to maintain the façade of being a normal human teenager barely scraping by in the big city. He kept ingredients he would never use in the cupboard, a carton of eggs in the fridge he replaced every so often, and other hints and clues to cover his tracks. A gross bloody shirt with kagune residue would get Doves on his back faster than he could make a cup of coffee. But here it was, his shameful secret stuffed underneath the mattress for when he wanted it.

 

Teshima liked the smell.

 

Every ghoul had a favorite scent, he reasoned, and sometimes it made them a little… instinctive, and possessive, and brought out that selfish need to _mark_ it as their own. He was hardly the most territorial ghoul, but he still had instincts like everyone else. It had started with a curious whiff when he took the laundry out of the hamper. He set the shirt aside to deal with later, and then he brought it out on the days he didn't see Aoyagi, just as a reminder of the scent, and, well… It turned out he liked how Aoyagi smelled. He figured it was part of the reason he was so interested in the ghoul.

 

Teshima liked the smell a little too much.

 

He curled into a ball on the mattress and buried his face into the back of the shirt so he couldn't breathe anything else. He would be mortified if Aoyagi ever found out he did this. It had become some sort of fix when he felt stressed (or jittery from not enough sleep and too much caffeine). It cleared his head of everything. Annoyance flared whenever he caught a whiff of the Rabbit ghoul mixed in, because that wasn't the scent he wanted.

 

He needed to control this before it went too far. His kakugan gleamed bright through the shadows, pupils dilated as he kept inhaling deeper.

 

Maybe it already had gone too far and he was fooling himself into thinking he could stop whenever he wanted.

 

His bikaku unfurled slowly from his lower back as he rubbed his face against the holes where ukaku wings burst through fabric. He hummed softly in the back of his throat and waved his tail in a lazy rhythm as he drowned himself to sleep.

 

In the mornings Teshima felt like a dumb animal every time he gave in to urges like that. It was becoming a nightly ritual and he wasn't proud of it. He stuffed the shirt unceremoniously back into its hiding place and stumbled into the shower to wash away any evidence. It did always feel good to have his kagune out, though, even if it left him hungrier.

 

* * *

 

 

"You look hungry," Aoyagi commented in that soft voice of his.

 

Teshima blinked, startled, and sat a little straighter in the café chair. He then chuckled and scratched the back of his neck when he realized he had been caught staring at the humans at the next table over. How long had he been staring? Had anyone else noticed?

 

"I guess I zoned out a little there, huh? It _has_ been a while since my last meal," he admitted carefully. Discussing the topic so casually in public wasn't something Teshima had dared to do before, and his eyes darted down to the black coffee in his hands. The last time he ate had been the day he met Aoyagi. He had been distracted since. By Aoyagi.

 

Aoyagi said nothing. Teshima felt like the other ghoul was radiating disapproval, though, and his apologetic smile twisted into a pout.

 

"Okay, okay, I… I promise I'll pick something up tonight."

 

Aoyagi looked satisfied with this, and finished his coffee with a loud slurp. Teshima's lips quirked back into a fond smile. He looked forward to sharing these small moments. He covered his expression by leaning into his hand, and hoped fervently that he didn't look as embarrassing as he felt.

 

Aoyagi glanced up through his bangs and held direct eye contact.

 

"Why don't you like eating?" he asked seriously.

 

Teshima swallowed, and looked away from the intense stare. That could be a loaded question for ghouls, but in his case, the answer was simple.

 

"I do like eating," Teshima murmured. "I just don't like going alone."

 

Aoyagi frowned.

 

 _Maybe he doesn't understand because he does everything alone_ , Teshima mused. _Maybe he's always been alone._

 

Teshima wasn't a loner by choice; he missed the group that had taken him in and supported him for years. They had only disbanded to evade Doves. Hunting alone made him feel inadequate, especially when he lost his kills to aggressive scavengers but wasn't strong enough to steal from others.

 

After mulling it over, Aoyagi nodded once in acceptance.

 

"I'll go with you," he stated firmly. "Then you won't go hungry."

 

Teshima gawked.

 

"You… you don't have to do that," he quickly backpedaled. "I'm fine with it, I was just complaining! Really, Aoyagi, it's…"

 

He trailed off at the earnest glint in predatory gold eyes.

 

"…We do make a good team," Teshima chuckled nervously, and hung his head in acquiescence. It didn't seem like Aoyagi would be dissuaded once he made up his mind.

 

He did want to see that beautiful ukaku kagune one more time.

 

* * *

 

 

The setting sun had all but vanished below the Tokyo skyline, and soon it would be dark enough to hunt in the park without masks. The pair of ghouls crouched in the tree branches pulled their hoods up. The air grew cold enough that their breath was visible in small clouds.

 

Teshima wiped a small spot of drool from the corner of Aoyagi's mouth with his sleeve. Nothing ever fazed the smaller ghoul, did it? He didn't even blink, eyes trained on the walking path below their perch.

 

Teshima usually set his sights lower, but with a partner, they could score some meat that actually tasted good. It was as close to guaranteed success as he could imagine… a certain victory. He was already excited at the prospect and it was a struggle to keep his hunger in check. He couldn't let his eyes turn just yet.

 

(It was also an internal struggle not to lean in and inhale too deeply, because that aroma would calm his jangling nerves, but he would lose all semblance of control if he gave in now. Stick to the plan.)

 

They both perked up at the distant sound of footfalls. There would always be night owls who believed that reflective tape and a whistle made them immune to danger.

 

"Just one," Aoyagi murmured. His ears were a little sharper. Teshima squeezed his shoulder in agreement.

 

"Here I go," he whispered, and dropped to the ground.

 

Thudding sneakers closed the distance. When the jogger cleared the hedges and neared the trees, he was met by a disheveled teenager with dirty clothes and twigs in his wavy hair.

 

"Oh thank god, someone else is out here," Teshima gasped, and grabbed the confused man by the shirt. He could hear the already elevated heart rate spike with adrenaline. The sheen of salty sweat on skin made Teshima's mouth water, but he did not break character.

 

"Are you okay? Do you need help?" the athlete spluttered, halting his pace. 

 

"I… I got mugged," he cried out. "I lost my wallet and my phone! D… do you have a cell phone I can use? I'm sorry to ask, but it's an emergency!"

 

The stranger nodded quickly and unstrapped his arm band. Teshima took the proffered phone and stepped back a pace. A frisson of anticipation ran down his spine straight to his kakuhou, which grew uncomfortably warm. His hands trembled, which was outside of his control but thankfully added to his cover.

 

"I don't know if the mugger is still out there," he babbled convincingly. "Did you see anyone else in the park tonight? Is there a guard, a policeman?"

 

The jogger shook his head. "I haven't seen anyone," he stated in apology. "But I can -"

 

"Good," Teshima interrupted as he visibly relaxed and stuffed the phone in his pocket. Black bled into his sclera. Irises flashed wicked red. "Then no one will see this."

 

And with a crooked smile he raised a finger and pointed to the darkening sky, where an ominous silhouette with red wings soared.

 

* * *

 

 

Teshima gulped eager mouthfuls of the steaming corpse before it could cool in the night air. It tasted so good after he had fasted for so long.

 

His scorpion-like kagune dug a wider hole into the jogger's chest cavity, allowing him access to the organ meats he liked best. Offal spilled into a messy pile in the dirt path. For once, he could eat his fill. Whatever they left behind would either be snapped up by scavengers or found by some terrified human once the sun came up. It was too risky to take any meat with him, so he would gorge himself.

 

Aoyagi was crowded next to him, jostling for a better position to satisfy his impatience. Red wings still bristled from his back despite the strain it was putting on his stamina. Soon the ukaku would flicker and burn out. Teshima realized he had stopped to stare once Aoyagi actually shoved him aside, and he fell onto his side with a chuckle.

 

"Here," Teshima said, and reached out to the dead man's face. Rigor mortis had not yet set in, so the eyelids were still closed. Deft fingers peeled them back and delicately plucked a round eyeball from its socket. With a tug, he detached the tether of nerves. He held the delicacy between two fingers until Aoyagi peered up through his shaggy hair to see what he was doing.

 

"There's two, so we can each have one." Teshima smiled indulgently, and pushed the eyeball past Aoyagi's parted lips. The smaller ghoul chewed obediently, and swallowed. The intensity of Aoyagi's stare made Teshima fidget.

 

"You… don't like those?" Teshima asked with a tinge of disappointment. He thought he had guessed right. He licked the stickiness off his fingers as a distraction. "Aww, that's one of my favorite parts. I usually don't get to have them. It's okay, though, I…"

 

Without warning Aoyagi sprang into his chest and slammed him to the ground.

 

Teshima was momentarily stunned. He gaped up at shining ukaku crystals and a kakugan that pierced his very soul, and his heart leaped into his throat.

 

"C-calm down, Aoyagi! You're getting too excited," Teshima gasped. He squirmed underneath the ghoul's weight, but Aoyagi gripped his shirt and pulled him closer.

 

"They do taste good, but…"

 

Aoyagi's growl was thick with emotion. Teshima had never heard him speak like that before. He waited with bated breath, suddenly not daring to move.

 

"I can't forget how Junta tastes," he groaned.

 

Teshima shuddered. Aoyagi sank backward with his head hanging and allowed Teshima to sit up. His ukaku finally broke in a wisp of red plasma.

 

Teshima shuffled forward on his knees and held the smaller ghoul against him in a desperate hug. He could have sworn he was not an impulsive person. He was meticulous and prepared for every possibility, or so he thought, before Aoyagi ruined him. His bikaku rolled up his pants leg, exposing a pale thigh.

 

Aoyagi's fingers twitched, and a small whine caught in his throat.

 

"Do it," Teshima whispered like he did last time. Only this time, he added, "Please."

 

Aoyagi lunged.

 

Teeth plunged into muscle and tendon, and as always, the ghoul held nothing back. His leg jerked in reflex, spasmed violently against the ground as chunks of muscle were chewed noisily off the bone. Tears streamed down Teshima's cheeks as he coughed and choked back the shout fighting its way out of his heaving chest. His kagune lashed wildly behind him, but he didn't struggle as Aoyagi bit deeper.

 

* * *

 

 

It lasted for longer than he could measure. When the chewing finally stopped, a tongue lapped at the welling blood left behind.

 

Teshima panted raggedly. Through blurred vision he watched his flayed thigh begin to heal. He had just fed; he could regenerate faster than usual, but it did nothing for the pain. He craved to eat more, but another urge was stronger than hunger.

 

His bikaku darted out and wrapped tightly around Aoyagi's waist to pin him in place. He grabbed a fistful of shaggy hair and bent to bury his nose against the nape of Aoyagi's neck.

 

"I can't forget how Aoyagi smells," he exhaled, and pressed a kiss to the exposed skin. He felt the ghoul shiver underneath his light touch like he knew what Teshima really meant.

 

Teshima rubbed his cheek on warm skin, and Aoyagi did not pull away. With a breathy sigh of relief, Teshima gave himself over to the dumb animal urge, and nuzzled the ghoul to mingle their scents. He wanted to _mark_ Aoyagi, to possess him and own him and keep him forever. There was something magnetic about Aoyagi that made him impossible for Teshima to ignore or resist. He needed this.

 

Aoyagi leaned into the contact, and at some point he must have turned because the next thing Teshima knew, they were kissing.

 

They were kissing in a park next to a corpse they murdered and devoured together, and wasn't that just the most romantic evening a ghoul could imagine? Teshima stifled a hysterical giggle, and relaxed the hand in Aoyagi's hair to thread his fingers gently through silky strands. Everything was okay now.

 

They were both coming down, sated, calm; riding out the waves of energy and excitement of the kill, and the desperation of their fledgling pair bond. There was comfort in the sweetness of the kiss. When their lips parted, their kakugan had faded and only violet eyes met gold.

 

Teshima smiled shakily and bumped his forehead against Aoyagi's. He didn't trust his voice to speak, so he said nothing as their fingers laced together. They didn't need words.

 

They stood, and his injured leg buckled, and he laughed tiredly as Aoyagi insisted on supporting his weight all the way back to the apartment. They tried to be quiet up the stairs but they woke the surly superintendent anyway, who grumbled about youths and drinking and thankfully didn't turn on the lights. Teshima counted the money from the stolen wallet, then fell asleep on his mattress while waiting for Aoyagi to finish showering.

 

When he woke up, he had no idea what time it was. The sun was too bright through the window. His leg was stiff and achy, and his shoulders were sore from sleeping in an awkward position.

 

The smaller ghoul had nestled with his head tucked under Teshima's chin. He was wearing a shirt too large for him, and he was softly snoring. Teshima smiled drowsily and curled his arms tighter around Aoyagi's waist. He had not planned for this outcome. But for one brief moment in time, he also had nothing to worry about.

 

* * *

 

**Author's Note:**

> -Spoiler doodles by meeee:  
> https://twitter.com/Magepaw/status/576517429385392129  
> https://twitter.com/Magepaw/status/577317439731560448


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